TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT, DENVER: So here’s the deal. We’re in a “business cubicle” at the Minneapolis airport. The guy to my right is yammering about fiscal projections. The guy to my left is penciling in music notes, composing something. That’s kinda cool. And me, I’m preparing for tonight! For a speaking fiasco. One night only, where I go lay it all out there for Denver finest creatives. If you are reading these words, holy shit, you better be going to the show. I’m backtracing you, and making a list!

OFFICIAL DETAILS CAN BE FOUND HERE: Tall Tales From A Large Man: Aaron Draplin in Denver

Last night’s talk at the Walker Art Center was incredible. We sold the joint out! The place was packed. A pretty good lookin’ crowd too. I should know, cuz those Minnesotans were all eyeballing me. I saw those faces. One guy, so beardy, just wouldn’t let up. No problem. I stared him right down. Good, clean fun.

I’d just like to thank all the good people of the Walker for rolling the dice on me. Andrew, Emmet, Dylan, the AV gang, all the designers, the dude from Brazil, Ryno, Rezac, Jason Miller, Seth Engman, Bryan Haker, Grandpa George crew, Todd Piper-Hauswirth, Mike & Molly, Scott Cal Surf, Dan Black and all the other champions who made it out. So blown away. One of the best nights of my little life. Mean that with all I got.

Okay, I gotta dry up these tears, cuz, (here’s where we go “third person”…so gross…) WE have OFFICIAL BUSINESS in downtown Denver tonight! This plan was set in motion by spirited folks months ago, all leading up to tonight. Our biggest night in Denver since that one time Larry, Gary and I almost died at the hands of a drifter at an undisclosed exit off I-70. That was a close one.

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ALL OUR INVITED. EVEN LARRY: Tall Tales From A Large Man: Aaron Draplin in Denver

WE MADE A POSTER FOR COLORADO: And we’ve uploaded it to this site for yer viewing pleasure up above. Inspired by the incredible Colorado flag, Denver street sign logos and primary unfuckwithableness, we whipped up a poster that we’re calling, “Colorado Collected.” Everything we’ve ever loved about the state. And we go way back. To like 1986 and that first family trip to Vail, where, if my spotty memory serves me correct, I drank my first glass of fresh-squeezed orange juice. I won’t be forgetting that one, ever. Thanks, Vail. Cool logo.

So, we’ve been dragging a box of these posters all over the nation. Down to Savannah, then up to Minneapolis and now over to Denver. You need one of these. Tonight, we offer them up at special, formulated “Denver-Only” prices. These will go fast, so secure one at the show! Way limited edition. French paper! 4-colors laid down thick. Square edges. Good for mountain shack, Colfax apartment, supermax prison cell, Rocky Mountain lean-to, Grand Junction compound or Durango ranch ranchhand sleeping quarters. Works for all walls. Add a little spirit to the place you call home. Do it. Tonight, we unleash them!

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ROCKY MOUNTAIN HIGH: Tall Tales From A Large Man: Aaron Draplin in Denver

OUR FINAL PITCH: We’ve got 14 minutes until our flight leaves, so we gotta get real with you. This is it, Denver. No more fuckin’ around. No more hot talk. We’re coming in hot, and our going to breathe in that Mile-Highâ„¢ air into our lungs, exhale, and then will deliver a suckerpunch of a talk scientifically-designed to inspire, set the goddamn record straight, entertain, puzzle and inspire. One night only. Our traveling roadshow, hot off one of the biggest nights of our lives in Minneapolis, for you. For Denver. Orange things. Violently-stocked merch table. Firm handshakes. Sweat. A stinking jacket from the Cabela’s bargain cave. Posters. Tall tales. Independence. Halfwit threats. Truth. Spirit. Freedom. Futura Bold. Multi-media prowess. Big words. Little ideas. Dachshunds. Ghosts. Plus a couple other things.

Be there, Denver. Remember, we’re backtracing you.

Okay, I, er, WE, gotta go catch a flight. Gonna be packed into that fucker. I just know it. No sweat, though…the show much go on! See you tonight!