Goodbye, Pittsburgh. It was great. Thanks.

On the way out of town I passed this little sign up. What is Cut Rate? Liquor? Bargains? Someone, help.

168. “Bloom’s Cut Rate.”

Halfway in between in Pittsburgh and Allentown is Hershey. They make chocolate there. You know the deal.

And, yes, the town “smelled of chocolate.” I drove right downtown and was floored by that. Then I followed these pukey signs out to “Chocolate Land” or something, in some big theme park sprawl and took some chumpy tour. What I thought was the world-famous Hershey Chocolate Factory Tour I’ve heard so much about over the years was the “new and improved” shitville tour. You get carted through this slick advertisement/commercial/infotainment nightmare where you “learn” about the beans and the process and the volumes and stuff. Fun, sure, but, I was hoping to see workers and rivers of chocolate and mountains of Reese peanut butter cups and shit. Oh, the tour dumps you out, conveniently, into a gargantuan gift shop. Perfect. Like, duh.

169. “Hershey, Penn.”
170. “Vintage tins.”
171. “Vats of chocolate.”
172. “Trillions of kisses.”
173. “Tour completed.”
174. “For Ryno. For Larry, too.”

Bumming after the Hershey tour, I stopped here. More my speed.

175. “Roadside America.”
176. “6,000 square foot miniature village.”
177. “Miniature village, no.01”
178. “Miniature village, no.02”
179. “Miniature village, no.03”
180. “Miniature village, no.04”
181. “Laurence Gieringer, Miniature Master.”

Oh, I was in Amish country, too. And something Dutch, too.

182. “Scary Amish sculptures.”
183. “Dutch Country.”

Back out on the interstate, I passed up this 9/11 Tribute Bus and thought about the sad aniversary coming up in a couple days.

184. “Tribute Bus, no.01”
185. “Tribute Bus, no.02”
186. “Tribute Bus, no.03”

Got into Allentown, excited to see molten lava being poured into glowing cauldrons of industrial hell. Instead, I saw ratty-lookin’ East Coast thugz with carefully-manicured beard stripes and gold chains and shit who had nothing but dirty looks for me. Quite the welcome. Real “hard,” man.

Bethlehem was a little better, what little I saw of it. I’d had enough, so, I called it a night, found a hotel and bedded down. Tomorrow, the Martin Guitar factory tour. This is GOING to be amazing. Can’t wait. Been dreaming of that one all summer long. Then, I’m going to this place called, “New York City.” You may have heard of it.