Saw Road To Perdition last night. I gotta say, It was excellent. Another Sam Mendes masterpiece. The sets, the scenery, the cinematography and the language all factored into the subtle success of this film. A gangster film at the root, the difference of the narrative was the believability and human quality. There was nothing romantic about the dirty work here. The characters felt real. An amazing film, a “must see.”

I’m settling into my routine without Melissa being around. It’s lonely, but it’s for the better. The apartment feels so empty. No cats, no hair, no Melissa propped on the couch. It’s amazing how someone can be such a part of yer everyday existence.

She was always around. There was always another person to talk to. The place just sort of seems “regular” now. Oh well. She is home, enjoying being with her family. She needed that. Hopefully that will allow her to reevaluate her situation and inspire her to do something fruitful. I wish I was back there too.

That part is eating at me. I want to be home, in comfortable surroundings. As much as I love Portland, and Oregon in general, this isn’t my home and I feel disconnected. I have the most amazing job a fella could ask for, and I’m wrastlin’ with where I should be. The folks of CINCO have been good to me, and I intend to do a good stretch of time with them.

So I deal with this change in atmosphere by focusing on work and projects. It keeps me busy and keeps my mind off the bigger things. I’m doing very well here and in a couple months will be out of the red. I feel good about our projects and our contribution. It’s a good place that puts out good work.

Funny how things go. I just miss havin’ her around.