Photo: ©2006 DDC Merchandise Archives

“I’m no mathematician, but your father has been telling me two inches is six inches for 35 years.” -Lauren Draplin in reference to the act of creation that made us.

This handy, pocket-sized ruler will come in handy when you need to measure things that are small.

Some examples of how we use these:
01. Measuring Gary turds.
02. Dialing in Gocco registration.
03. Helping to pry Matt Kass’ foot out of his mouth after he says stupid shit.

Good, solid American Pine wood contruction that, after some whittling down, could double as a sharp, deadly shank or some sort, good for street fights or hunting.

The first of many products in an upcoming project launch. Stay tuned.

01. Pine construction.
02. “Gary Nose” Black ink pressed into that wood real hard, for life.
03. Combined with the slogan, “We” measure up!” this unit is lethal.
04. Six inches, complete with hash marks for “ease of use” measurement.
05. Will fit in your pocket.
06. Buy 50 of them, arrange neatly into geometric “teepee” formation, light on fire, then, tell a couple tall tales.

$2 PPD

For customers using PayPal, click the link above they’ll take it from there.

For customers who aren’t using PayPal, send us an email here and we’ll get back to you with an address to ship the funds to. We accept money orders and cold hard cash, so, get with it, man!

All orders are shipped out the day they are received. Fast, too. We spare no expense.

©2006 Draplin Design Co., Dry Goods Div., Merch Dept., Portland, Ore.